INTRODUCTION

Diversity in sexual orientation, especially homosexuality, is a complex social phenomenon that often causes controversy in various parts of the world, including in Indonesia. In this context, homosexuality is not only seen as a sexual orientation but also as part of a broader identity that is interconnected with various social, cultural and psychological factors. However, research shows that a person's sexual orientation, including homosexuality, can be influenced by social and family environments, as well as life experiences that are unique to each individual (Saputra & Nasvian, 2022; Yanti et al., 2020). On the other hand, there is no definitive definition of Gay and Lesbian in our society due to the complexity of the issue (Sewell et al., 2016). However, even when defining Gay and Lesbian, we have one standard definition, which is same-sex attraction. This standard is certainly not ideal because, in general, a person's attraction is formed between a man and a woman and eventually becomes a life principle that is known by many people (Putri, 2023). Based on this life principle, there are pros and cons, especially in the context of Indonesian society's relationships in addressing the existence of Gays and Lesbians in society.

The situation of acceptance and rejection of LGBT friendships in Indonesia is a complex theme and involves various social, cultural, religious, and psychological aspects. Data from the Ministry of Health shows that in 2012, there were more than one million people involved in same-sex relationships in Indonesia, and this figure is expected to continue to rise (Wafi, 2020). This phenomenon has led to various societal reactions, ranging from acceptance to strong rejection, often rooted in the cultural and religious values that dominate society (Ardi et al., 2018). In this context, it is important to understand how Indonesians, especially the younger generation, perceive LGBT individuals or communities and the role social norms play in shaping these attitudes. Research conducted by Setyawan and Muhiddin shows that there are significant differences in perceptions of LGBT among the younger generation, where some individuals see sexual orientation as usual.

In contrast, others consider it a mistake (Setyawan & Muhiddin, 2023). It reflects the dualism in people's views influenced by their educational background, religion, and social environment so that human rights are only formally recognized. However, their implementation is often hampered by strong religious norms and conservative societal views (Yansyah & Rahayu, 2018). It is also in line with the results of the Public Controversy Survey on LGBT+ (SMRC National Survey, 2016), which states that 81.5% of Indonesians think that gay men and lesbians are not allowed by religion to have relationships. However, on the other hand, Pew Research's Global Attitudes Project Report on attitudes towards homosexuality, which was conducted twice in 2013 and 2019, showed that there was a progressive score given where there was an increase in the acceptance of homosexual orientation in social settings from 3% to 9%. Regarding communication and acceptance, some initiatives try to create safe spaces for LGBT individuals, primarily through social media. Setyawan and Muhiddin note that social media can serve as a platform for expressing identity and building community (Setyawan & Muhiddin, 2023). However, despite these spaces, challenges remain, especially when dealing with deep stigma and societal rejection. Minority Stress Theory provides a framework for understanding the specific stressors that LGBT individuals encounter due to their minority status. This theory emphasizes that the unique stressors faced by LGBT populations-such as discrimination, social rejection, and internalized stigma-can lead to adverse mental health outcomes, including anxiety, depression, and suicidal ideation (McDermott et al., 2021; McConnell et al., 2017). In Indonesia, where societal norms are predominantly heteronormative and often hostile towards LGBT identities, these stressors are exacerbated. The Indonesian Ulema Council (MUI) is active in preventing the spread of LGBT through various proselytization strategies, which shows that there is a systematic effort to respond to LGBT presence in society (Larasati, 2024). It shows that while there is room for acceptance, forces also seek to maintain traditional norms.

In the context of mental health, LGBT individuals who experience discrimination tend to have lower psychological well-being, indicating the negative impact of social stigma (Prahastami et al., 2023). It suggests that social acceptance is crucial to the mental health of LGBT individuals. In addition, research by Khoir revealed that LGBT individuals who are Muslim often face internal conflicts between their sexual identity and religious teachings, which can cause stress and anxiety (Khoir, 2020). The prevalence of victimization and mental health problems among LGBTQ youth emphasizes the need for a supportive environment that affirms their identity (Williams et al., 2021). However, in the current situation, the social environment says otherwise, where norms and culture are built as a form of guidance in interacting with others (Stivers et al., 2024), and they have experienced mixing with religious values. This rule has led to the judgment of people with homosexual orientation for engaging in non-heteronormative behaviour. It also forms a grouping in society based on discrimination between heterosexuals as ingroups and homosexuals as outgroups (Harwood, 2020).

Recent studies suggest the fear of misidentification is particularly pronounced among heterosexual men, who may exhibit more negative attitudes towards homosexuality compared to heterosexual women (Cook et al., 2011). This difference can be a barrier to friendships across sexual orientations, as heterosexual men may feel uncomfortable or threatened by the potential implications of associating with gay men or lesbian women. Avoidance behaviour is not only a reflection of personal prejudice but is also often influenced by broader societal norms that stigmatize same-sex relationships (LaCosse & Plant, 2018).

Additionally, the concept of minority stress plays a vital role in understanding these friendship dynamics. Minority stress refers to the chronic stress experienced by individuals who belong to stigmatized social groups, which can lead to mental health problems such as depression and anxiety (Mereish & Poteat, 2015). For gay and lesbian individuals, the stress of navigating friendships with heterosexuals can be compounded by the need to hide their sexual orientation or to manage the reactions of their heterosexual peers (Mereish & Poteat, 2015; Johnson & Amella, 2013). Conversely, although minority stress can affect gay and lesbian individuals in friendships with heterosexuals, there are also arguments to suggest that these interactions can bring positive benefits. Friendships with heterosexual individuals can open opportunities to understand different perspectives and build empathy between groups. In addition, many gay and lesbian individuals feel no need to hide their sexual orientation in an inclusive environment, allowing them to build authentic and genuine relationships. Therefore, research exploring interactions between homosexuals and heterosexuals can provide valuable insights into how to reduce prejudice and increase understanding.

This research has relevant implications in that human rights and religious perspectives in the context of LGBT in Indonesia must be considered simultaneously to achieve a more holistic understanding (Yansyah & Rahayu, 2018). By understanding that human rights include the right to love and interact with anyone without discrimination, this research can help drive positive social change. A better understanding of relationships between individuals with different sexual orientations can help improve social diplomacy and inter-group relations in society (Huda, 2023). It is important to note that interactions between homosexuals and heterosexuals have not always been smooth. A conflict of religiosity can arise in the context of homosexual relationships, which can cause discomfort and tension (Setiyo & Kusumaningsih, 2020). Therefore, this study aims to explore the experiences of individuals, the challenges they face and how they can overcome conflicts in the context of friendship.

METHODS

This research employs a qualitative approach with data collection through offline interviews, chosen due to the sensitive nature of Gay, Lesbian, and Heterosexual topics in Indonesian society. Participants are selected using purposive sampling, with inclusion criteria specifying individuals who identify as Gay, Lesbian, or Heterosexual (see Table 1). Privacy and comfort for participants are prioritized, and interviews are conducted in a private, direct setting. The interview guide includes open-ended questions focused on the participants� experiences and social perceptions of interactions between different sexual orientations. We analyzed the data with the Interpretative Psychological Analysis (IPA) technique. The IPA refers to Smith et al.'s (2009) six steps which include (1) reading the transcription of a participant repeatedly; (2) initial noting, (3) developing emergent themes; (4) identifying common relationships between themes; (5) moving on to the next participant's case and; (6) identifying similar patterns between cases. The participants indicated their willingness to participate voluntarily and maintain confidentiality by signing the consent form, and they have the right to withdraw from their participation at any point of the study. The interviews lasted approximately 60 minutes each.

In terms of limitations, this study acknowledges that the researcher�s interpretations of the interview data are subjective and shaped by the researcher�s personal judgments, opinions, and emotional responses during the interviews. These interpretations may be influenced by the researcher�s biases, which could affect the depth and accuracy of the analysis. The subjective nature of phenomenological analysis, while providing rich, personal insights, may also limit the objectivity of the findings. This study seeks to answer the primary research questions: How do LGBT individuals experience and perceive their interactions with heterosexual individuals in various social contexts? Additionally, how do societal norms and individual biases influence these interactions? These questions aim to provide a deeper understanding of the complexities surrounding social interactions between individuals of differing sexual orientations.

RESULT

In this study, 4 themes were found that researchers discussed further; 1. Perspective about LGBT in Indonesia, 2. Interaction Strategies and Social Support, 3. Building Trust Amidst Social Stigma, 4. The Challenges and Hopes of LGBT Acceptance in Indonesian Society.

Theme 1. Perspective about LGBT in Indonesia

The view of homosexuality from individuals who have a homosexual orientation and from the perspective of heterosexuals is still considered a very taboo and closed topic in Indonesia. As one respondent put it, "The view of every individual in Indonesia is still very taboo, especially about the existence of LGBT" (Koko, 21, Student). Even though some people are starting to open up and accept differences in sexual orientation, the general view is that it is something foreign and not by prevailing social norms. As stated by Ai, "Nowadays, it is also rare that there are people who are more open in their views and accept differences in sexual orientation" (Ai, 20, Student). It indicates that there is still an inability of Indonesian society to accept the fact that sexual orientations that differ from heterosexuals are also part of human reality.

On the other hand, respondents who have a homosexual orientation revealed that attraction to the same sex has been present since childhood. One respondent, Cila, stated, "The feeling of being attracted to other women has been there since childhood, although it still cannot be said to be true even though we are still children" (Cila, 20, Student). They shared their experiences of how these feelings of attraction developed, even though they were often considered wrong or inappropriate, especially at a young age. For example, Koko added, "From a young age I was probably already quite feminine, and also maybe because I'm the last child and the only boy out of 3 siblings and my older siblings are all girls" (Koko, 21, Student). The interpretation of sexual orientation is often accompanied by self-internalized stigma associated with the emergence of one's sexual orientation, such as the condition of gender minority in sibling relationships and feminine gender expression since childhood. Respondents also revealed that physical criteria and likeable characters influence same-sex attraction, but these feelings vary between individuals.

For heterosexual individuals, sexual orientation is often perceived as something natural and straightforward without question. One respondent stated, "No specific event made me choose to be hetero-oriented; it just happened, and the surrounding environment supported my orientation" (Ai, 20, Student). Social support strengthens heterosexual individuals' confidence in living their orientation without pressure or confusion. A supportive environment provides psychological security and makes it easier for them to live carefree lives. In contrast, homosexual individuals often face stigma and pressure in conservative Indonesian society, suggesting a gap in social and psychological experiences between the two groups due to cultural norms.

Theme 2. Interaction Strategies and Social Support

Building interpersonal relationships requires close communication, but gay and lesbian individuals often face more significant challenges for fear of exacerbating social stigma. Cila, a lesbian, revealed that she often initiates communication first to establish a relationship: "Mostly I am the one who gets closer to them, I do not know, I think my surroundings are many introverts, many of my friends are shy, so usually I am the one who approaches myself." This strategy reflects her attempts to adjust to gaining social acceptance in heterosexual friendships. Nonetheless, gay and lesbian individuals still face the fear of rejection by both heterosexual and same-orientation individuals. This fear often affects the way they interact. Cila, for example, tends to accept when his friends do not support him after learning about his sexual orientation: "Actually, I'm more like resigned too, because yes, each person is different." Meanwhile, Koko limits interactions with individuals who show disapproval of her orientation: "We are afraid that we will also disturb him and get emotional, so we are more restrictive." This fear highlights how social stigma can limit the freedom of gay and lesbian individuals to express themselves authentically.

However, social support from orientationally similar environments, such as the LGBT community, can boost their confidence as they feel more accepted and comfortable, "I feel comfortable being supported by them; I even feel like speaking out," says Cila. Positive and humorous responses often accompany this support. In addition, the support of heterosexual friends, such as providing advice or entertainment, also plays a positive role, as Koko said, "being taken for a walk to get my mood back again." It shows that relationships across sexual orientations can have a significant impact. The view of a heterosexual, Ai, emphasizes this: "Intimacy can be built with anyone, regardless of their sexual orientation; we must respect and understand each other." This equality in social relationships is key to reducing inequality and stigma and building healthy and supportive connections for all individuals.

Theme 3. Building Trust Amidst Social Stigma

In a situation where Indonesian society is less accepting of homosexual orientation, participants reported no significant difficulties in building friendships on campus, but this did not necessarily eliminate the challenges they faced outside of this inclusive environment. Koko's statement, "Nothing really, because on campus the focus is on school, studying," reflects the pragmatic nature of campus life, which tends to overlook the impact of social prejudice. A key challenge in friendships is finding people who are truly trustworthy and accepting of Gay and Lesbian people of different orientations. The deep need for trust and acceptance reflects a more complex emotional reality for homosexual individuals. Koko expressed that trust is an important criterion in friendship: "The criteria for friendship is probably being open with each other, but as humans, there must be hurt feelings." It suggests balancing vulnerability and caution in building meaningful relationships, often influenced by fears of stigma and betrayal.

In addition, criteria such as openness and mutual understanding are also important in their relationships, as expressed by Koko, a gay man: "...maybe open up to each other like I know about him, he knows about me." It shows that healthy relationships require honesty and mutual understanding. On campus, friends are not just academic support but also emotional pillars. Friendship involves a range of emotions, sadness or grief-that can strengthen or weaken bonds depending on shared perspectives. Cila highlighted the reciprocal nature of friendships: "Friends are there to support each other so that the friendship runs for a long time, they must support each other." It emphasizes the importance of mutual understanding and empathy in sustaining friendships. This dynamic is not only relevant for homosexual individuals, but for them, the experience of social rejection makes the process of finding genuine and supportive friends more meaningful and urgent.

Theme 4. The Challenges and Hopes of LGBT Acceptance in Indonesian Society

A systemic challenge facing gay and lesbian individuals in Indonesia is that societal norms are still heavily influenced by religious teachings, resulting in the slow acceptance of diverse sexual orientations. This research shows that both homosexual and heterosexual individuals are encouraged to reflect deeply on their identities. As Ai said, "Individuals are free to find their true selves...find support or people who can respect and accept your decision" (Ai, 20, female student). It confirms that understanding one's orientation requires personal exploration and acceptance of oneself and the environment. However, social norms often limit this freedom, creating tension between personal authenticity and societal expectations.

Despite these challenges, it is important to recognize the common humanity of all individuals, regardless of their sexual orientation. Koko (21, a university student) said, "LGBT does not bother you. They are also human beings in general, and they, as LGBT, also do good things too." This view encourages us to look beyond differences and accept diversity as a natural part of human life. Cila (20, university student) also expressed hope for wider community acceptance: "I hope that more and more people will be able to accept it in terms of humanity." This statement reflects a desire for tolerance and recognition of the dignity of each individual while challenging the prejudices that often discriminate against those with non-heteronormative sexual orientations. The fear and prejudice experienced by gay and lesbian individuals often stem from social misconceptions and stereotypes. Participants in this study emphasized the importance of empathy and understanding, stressing that mutual respect can ease fears and facilitate more harmonious interactions. For example, the freedom to express oneself reasonably, as suggested by participants, can create safer public spaces where individuals feel comfortable interacting without fear of being judged or harmed.

Finally, the importance of self-exploration is a common concern for both individuals with homosexual and heterosexual orientations. Participants agreed that those who have yet to discover their sexual identity should not rush to make a decision but should take time to understand their desires, values and aspirations. This process of self-exploration, coupled with support from an accepting social environment, is key in shaping identity amidst social limitations.

DISCUSSION

In this study, researchers want to find out about their experiences about the social interaction, especially friendship between a Gay and Lesbian with a heterosexual person. It relates to the context in Indonesia, where it is difficult to accept that there is a sexual orientation that is different from the norm. The research found that the challenges of LGBT individuals in establishing friendships with heterosexuals in Indonesia are categorized by three conditions, namely negative perceptions of society, the internal stigma they experience, and the dynamics of sexual identity. All three play a role in creating challenges in friendships, either simultaneously or as stand-alone factors.

Society's negative perceptions of LGBT people reinforce social stigma, with heterosexism legitimizing discrimination and rejection of LGBT individuals (Rizkiani, 2023). It causes LGBT individuals to feel often alienated and have difficulty building healthy relationships with heterosexual peers. Indonesian society's resistance to diversity in sexual orientation is influenced by dominating social norms and religious teachings, so homosexuality remains taboo and forces LGBT individuals to adapt to heteronormative norms, which often leads to social dissatisfaction (Putri, 2022). In addition, the lack of understanding and education on LGBT issues exacerbates the situation. However, there are indications of change among younger generations who are more open to sexual diversity, although their attitudes vary, with some showing tolerance and understanding. In contrast, others remain stuck in prejudice and negative stereotypes (Setyawan & Muhiddin, 2023).

LGBT individuals' challenges in establishing friendships with heterosexuals in Indonesia are influenced by internalized stigma, which makes them feel alienated and unwelcome in the broader community. This stigma often leads to mental health problems, such as depression and anxiety, which are higher in LGBT individuals than heterosexuals and hinder their ability to build positive relationships with others (Andina, 2019). The dynamics of LGBT individuals' sexual identity are also very complex and often related to their life experiences. This study found that environmental factors, such as family dynamics and gender roles, can influence sexual identity development. It supports the view that internalized stigma can significantly hinder individuals' acceptance. Many LGBT individuals feel forced to hide their identity from society, which can lead to feelings of isolation and loneliness (Amelia et al., 2022). It can be explained through Minority Stress Theory, which states that individuals from marginalized groups, such as sexual and gender minorities, experience stress due to societal stigma, discrimination and prejudice, which adversely affects their mental health. This theory distinguishes between distal stressors (such as overt discrimination) and proximal stressors (such as internalized stigma and expectations of rejection) (Meyer, 2015). Therefore, it is important to create a safe space for LGBT individuals to express themselves without fear of stigma or discrimination.

Self-confidence, social support, interpersonal relationships, and the support system around them are issues that explain the experiences of LGBT individuals in forming friendships with heterosexuals. Self-confidence is important in LGBT interactions and is often influenced by social support from family, friends, and the LGBT community (Lestari & Fajar, 2020). Individuals who receive emotional and practical support tend to have higher self-confidence (Wang et al., 2021). This support helps them feel more comfortable expressing themselves and establishing relationships with heterosexual friends (Earle et al., 2020). Societal discrimination can decrease self-confidence and mental health, inhibiting positive relationships with heterosexuals (Dessel et al., 2017). Conversely, positive experiences can boost confidence and strengthen social support networks (Taylor et al., 2018). Open and honest communication between LGBT individuals and heterosexual peers is essential in interpersonal relationships. Research shows good communication can reduce misunderstandings and increase mutual understanding (McFadden, 2015). For LGBT individuals, friendship quality is more important than quantity, with criteria such as honesty, trust, acceptance, and openness to new views (Amati et al., 2018). By sharing experiences and perspectives, stronger and more supportive relationships can be established. Therefore, it is important for LGBT individuals to feel comfortable talking about their identity and experiences with heterosexual friends (Yuan et al., 2023).

The support system around LGBT individuals is crucial in their experience of heterosexual friendships. LGBT individuals who have access to LGBT support groups or organizations tend to have better mental health and are better able to cope with the challenges they face (Tam et al., 2011). These support systems provide a space to share experiences, get advice, and build stronger relationships with heterosexual friends (Najafi, 2023). The context of the campus as a relatively safe and structured environment for relationship building should not obscure the broader social challenges faced by homosexual individuals. Their ability to build strong emotional bonds, even across orientations, reflects resilience and adaptability. However, this should be understood in contrast to a less accepting social landscape, emphasizing the importance of creating inclusive spaces where trust and openness can flourish without fear of discrimination. LGBT individuals need to connect with existing support systems, both within the LGBT community and outside of it. Positive and supportive heterosexual friends can help LGBT individuals feel more accepted and valued (Ryan et al., 2010).

LGBT individuals' experiences of friendships with heterosexuals vary. This study demonstrates solidarity across sexual orientations, where although the LGBT community provides a sense of safety and understanding, the absence of barriers to friendships with heterosexual friends shows the potential for solidarity that transcends orientation. At the core of meaningful relationships is mutual respect and emotional connectedness, not shared identity. LGBT individuals living in more open and inclusive neighbourhoods tend to have more positive experiences in relationships with heterosexuals than those living in conservative neighbourhoods (Kang et al., 2015). These friendships help avoid mental health problems such as loneliness, depression and life dissatisfaction so that LGBT individuals do not feel pressured by social pressures (Bagwell, 2023). Support from friends can be equivalent to family support in preventing harmful behaviours (Puckett et al., 2019).

CONCLUSION

This study reveals the challenges faced by LGBT individuals in building friendships with heterosexual people in Indonesia, which are influenced by negative societal perceptions, internalized stigma, and sexual identity dynamics. Despite progress in the acceptance of diverse sexual orientations, especially among the younger generation, religiously-influenced social norms still slow down the process of broader acceptance. The social stigma attached to LGBT individuals often prevents them from forming healthy relationships, both with fellow LGBT people and with heterosexual friends. However, social support, both from openly heterosexual friends and the LGBT community, plays a key role in boosting their self-confidence and strengthening their interpersonal relationships. Open and honest interactions between LGBT and heterosexual individuals can reduce misunderstandings and deepen mutual understanding, which in turn strengthens relationships across sexual orientations.

Theoretically, this study enriches the understanding of minority stress theory by exploring the unique stressors experienced by LGBT individuals in Indonesia, particularly in their relationships with heterosexual peers. It highlights the impact of social stigma, internalized prejudice and rejection expectations on mental well-being and deepens the discussion on social and internalized discrimination in non-Western contexts. The findings provide insights for policymakers, educators and social workers to create inclusive environments for LGBT individuals, emphasizing the importance of social support and the promotion of open communication, empathy and mutual respect in reducing social stigma and building more inclusive communities.

However, this study has some limitations, including a sample limited to the Indonesian student population, which may not fully represent the experiences of LGBT individuals off-campus or in the broader context of society. Most of the respondents were also from younger age groups who tend to be more open to diverse sexual orientations, so the results of this study may not reflect the views of older age groups or individuals in areas with stronger conservative values. Therefore, future research is recommended to expand the sample to include LGBT individuals of different ages, social backgrounds, and geographical locations to get a more comprehensive picture. Further research could also explore the influence of social media and education in shaping attitudes towards LGBT and explore the psychological impact of social stigma and family support in improving the quality of life and mental well-being of LGBT individuals.

Acknowledgments

We want to express our heartfelt gratitude to all the participants who generously took the time to share their experiences during the interviews. This research would not have been possible without your participation and valuable contributions. We sincerely appreciate your honesty and openness throughout the process, which provided us with invaluable insights into the topic of this study. Your input has been crucial in enriching the findings and ensuring that this research can benefit the community and serve as a foundation for future investigations.

Declaration

In the process of this research, we did not collect any funds. The cost of this research was incurred from the independent costs of each author. Based on three participants who agreed to be interviewed by us. They are people we know, so they are willing to do so without coercion from themselves or us..

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Participants	Age	Sexual orientation	Personal background
Koko^a	21	Gay	The third of three children is the only male among the siblings. He is a university student with a feminine gender expression that he realized in childhood. Until now, he still has a fear of his sexual orientation being known by many people.
Cila	20	Lesbian	She has been attracted to women since kindergarten. An extroverted college student, she loves to relate, and this character helps her to be 'ignorant' when many people know she is a lesbian.
Ai	20	Heterosexual	She is a heterosexual student who has experience of befriending and working with lesbian and gay individuals during her time at university.